05th Feb2014

Someone Stole Guy Fieri’s Lamborghini 3 Years Ago

by Michael Chandler

And he did it like a bad ass.  Then things went south for Max Wade in a big way, but that’s not what this is about.  It’s about this:

At sixteen Max repelled into British Sports Cars, picked the lock, hot wired the thing, jammed up the Lojack and drove away in it.  He also accidentally turned on the windshield wipers, but nobody’s perfect… As Max proved when he shot at a girl he “desired” and her boyfriend FROM A MOTORCYCLE.  (The boyfriend and girlfriend were only slightly injured by flying glass thankfully).  This was after he began his career making fake IDs.

The story gets better: he was arrested at the storage unit he was renting.  The unit contained fake IDs, burglary equipment AND THE LAMBORGHINI HE STOLE A YEAR EARLIER.  He’s now facing a life sentence, which is probably for the best because super-villainy was a major possibility for this kid’s future.

Words by Michael Chandler

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